Banning Peanuts from Planes

The Llama Butchers

"I've had it with these bleep-bleep'n peanuts, on this bleep-bleep'n plane!"

Yeah, "Peanuts on a Plane" isn't as cool as Samuel L. Jackson going all Pulp Fiction on Snakes on a Plane, but today nuts are just about as evil as snakes.

And since now a kid can drop dead from eating a single nut, some concerned air travelers want to ban those tiny bags of honey roasted mercy peanuts from bleep-bleep'n planes.

The crux of the argument is that dealing with an allergic reaction when you're a mile high is a lot worse than on the ground. Yeah it is, but don't diabetics have the same problem, and don't they just carry their insulin kits with them?

But advocates of the ban say a nut allergy can flair up even if proteins from the peanuts - or "peanut dust" - are released into the air by other passengers rummaging around in their bags and then inhaled by an allergy sufferer.

So put a mask on your kid! Sorry, it might be a little embarrassing for them, but you got to do what you got to do. It builds character.

I went to school with a kid who had an allergy to bee stings, so he carried a giant injection with him at all times - like a gun in a holster - and his mother never petitioned the school to keep everyone inside during gym class because she didn't want him to feel alienated while everyone else played outside. He just carried around his injection. And it didn't slow him down at all. He was one of the best baseball players in our town.

But listen, its not that peanuts are that important. It isn't an "I have a right to peanuts" type argument. It's the principle of the thing. What's next? On Halloween should we fine the sweet old lady that puts Reese's Peanut Butter Cups in your kid's plastic pumpkin? The answer is no.

Plus it's economic issue too. In a hurting US economy, the last thing we need is another struggling industry. Banning peanuts could do that. American peanut producers do a lot of business with airlines, so banning peanuts from flights could have a negative impact on the industry, i.e. job losses - i.e. very bad.

I think we coddle children way too much. If you're kid is allergic to peanuts, gluten, milk, or whatever, it's your job as a parent to protect them, not the world at large. If you can't do that, we better call child protective services!